First Date MISTAKE & How to Avoid it! (VIDEO)
First Date MISTAKE & How to Avoid It! (VIDEO)
Over the last decade plus I’ve been privy to a LOT of dating mistakes. You can call these learning opportunities if you like. The bottom line is you don’t have to learn everything in life the hard way. In this next series of articles I’m going to share a few real life dating learning opportunities so you can avoid the same painful experience. As I’ve told you many times before in my blog posts over the years, I know first dates can be super stressful. I’m here to guide you through a much more relaxed and fun experience so be sure to read this blog and watch the video as part of my series on First Date Mistakes.
This is a video I made several years ago with my friend and awesome stylist, Dana Lynch from Elements of Image. Watch our short video for 3 tips on how to take the stress out of dressing for a date. Dana and I had a ton of fun on our first team effort so hope you enjoy our fashion and dating advice.
Here are 3 Things You Must Know to Dress for a Date:
Tip #1: Be sure to find out where you are going . It’s okay to ask – actually it’s more than okay, you really need to know in order to decide if you want to accept the invitation and if so, what is appropriate to wear for the occasion. Guessing is definitely not advised. Wearing a dressy dress and heels to a baseball game is not a recipe for having fun and getting to know someone new.
Matchmaker Reality Story to Avoid: Men - do not wear a casual “fishing” shirt to a classy restaurant or wear a printed sweatshirt to an upscale bistro for brunch. Yes, both of these things happened (2 different men). No they did not get a second date! Imagine that!
Tip#2: Decide what image you want to portray. A first date gives you the opportunity to reveal some of your personality to your date. Authenticity is really important. If you dress in a way that is not really indicative of who you are then he will not be meeting the real you. This is not a good start for a potential love relationship.
Don’t be tempted to step too far outside of your comfort zone here. However, if you never dress up or wear make-up, you might take this opportunity to step up your game a little bit. Don’t you want him to put some effort into his appearance when meeting you? Present your best self and have a bit of fun getting into the mood whether it’s casual or dressy.
Matchmaker Reality Story to Avoid: Successful client wore a fancy party dress and heels, lots of make-up and tons of jewelry to a casual wine bar to meet a blind date who was dressed in nice jeans and a nice button down shirt. While I’m all for dressing up for a first date, don’t go overboard for the location. Most men want to know that a woman knows how to dress properly for the occasion. Choose your personal style mindfully for the event. Personal preference: Always better to be a little over-dressed than under dressed - emphasis on the word little. These were my mother’s words of wisdom - a fashion queen until her passing at age 86.
Tip#3: Make sure your cloths fit properly AND you are comfortable in them. If you need to constantly push and pull on your clothes, it’s distracting for your date and makes you uncomfortable too. So, select your outfit including shoes and jewelry and then try everything on in advance. The clothes may not fit the way you want them to or as you remember. (Dana and I know this from personal experience. I try to blame my closet for shrinking my clothes, but the reality is a lot of us put on a few extra pounds especially during Covid!) Your size doesn’t matter, but the fit does. Wearing clothes that are too tight or too short makes anyone look uncomfortable.
My last note on the subject: Don’t be pressured to dress in a super sexy way with a very, very short skirt or dress that is too tight or shows a lot of cleavage. Your date could and probably will interpret this as desperate and “easy.” I know this this is how men think because I checked in with many men on this one.
Matchmaker Reality Story to Avoid: Lovely and successful woman repeatedly adjusted her blouse, dropped her bracelet several times and put lipstick on at the table during a dinner date. Her date found this behavior off-putting and consequently he did not ask her out again.
Dating someone new is a bit stressful without freaking out over what you’re going to wear . Dana from Elements of Image can help you. If you need a wardrobe re-fresh or something new to better reflect your personality today contact her. She’s super nice and really great at what she does!
If you’re ready to find that loving, healthy, supportive love relationship you’ve been dreaming of contact me for a complimentary consultation. We’ll chat about where you are and where you’d like to be with a love relationship. Don’t delay – this can be your time for love.
And be sure to subscribe to my weekly love relationship tips and advice and to Dana’s fashion tips too!
Much love,
Gayla Wick, Denver Love Coach