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Online Dating – True Love or a Romance Scam?

Gayla Wick - Wednesday, October 03, 2018

I hope you are enjoying my series about online dating. It pays to be savvy about this relatively new way of connecting with possible mates. If you think joining an online dating sight is even a remote possibility, then I urge you to read every article in this series.

Here is article number five and it’s critically important. Be sure to read it and pass it along to all of your single friends and family members. You could save yourself and others from being the target of a dating con artist. Think this couldn’t happen to you?

According to the FBI’s Internet Crimes Complaint Center, “Romance scams, also known as confidence scams, result in the highest amount of financial losses when compared to other Internet-facilitated crimes.” The average complainant (a woman 82% of the time) loses over a hundred thousand dollars. Victims of these types of crimes aren’t stupid; they’re uninformed and too trusting. Don’t let this happen to you.

Last week I shared a question often asked by single women: So what’s he really interested in – a relationship, friends with benefits, a fling, your bank account? We talked about not trying so hard to make a relationship work and about setting personal standards for your relationships. When a man is interested in something or someone he willingly puts effort into pursuing his interest. Let him do the pursuing.

But what if he’s super charming and later you find out he’s only after your money?

On a recent episode of the television series American Greed, two women were pursued by the same charming man - a career con artist. One was swindled out of $10,000 and thankfully woke up before giving him another $30,000. How does this happen? I’m going to tell you exactly how to prevent this from ever happening to you whether you meet him through online dating or not.

Please know these con artists are looking for women who have certain characteristics: they live alone, have not had a man in their life for a very long time, they have money and/or a job and are clearly supporting themselves and they are desperately seeking love. Con men are really good at picking up on the energy of desperation to find love.

Online Dating Rule 5: Don’t loan or give away large sums of money period.

The woman in this story had all of the above qualities. He was charming, paid for all their dates and spent time with her like no one had for decades. She fell hard for him. Then when he knew she was in love he told her a sob story about needing a 10,000 loan. She did not see the big red flags. Mr. Con Man had presented himself as a successful owner of a contracting business, drove an expensive car and liked to flash cash. So when he said he had a $300,000 deal he couldn’t complete because one of his critical $10,000 machines had broken, warning bells should have been obvious. He had no other resources – really?

The context of this loan request should have sounded alarms. A real man who owns a business, drives a luxury car and flashes cash would never ask his girlfriend for money, even if he needed it. He would have other resources. (By the way – who wants to date a guy who flashes cash around in public?) His success at scoring $10,000 led him to ask for more - $30, 000.

Thankfully she said no and he broke up with her on the spot - so much for true love. Don’t fall for this or any other sob story about needing large sums of money. A grown man who’s willing to ask his girlfriend for money has significant problems. Even if he’s not a scam artist do you really want to date a man who doesn’t have his financial house in order? Yes things happen, but do you want to be his rescue?

The four-step process I’ve outlined in my book, The Art of Attracting Authentic Love (A Transformational Four-Step Process) will give you the knowledge you need for dating with confidence and the peace of mind that you know how to recognize a really good man from a fraud.

Don’t put yourself in a position to fall for men who are unworthy of you. The more you know about online dating and dating in general, the better your results will be. Is it time to get a little guidance from a relationship expert? Contact me – the Denver Love Coach and let’s talk about where you are now and where you’d like to be with a love relationship.

Gayla Wick, Denver Love Coach and author of The Art of Attracting Authentic Love (A Transformational Four-Step Process) shows women how to go from frustrated and disappointed to attracting an authentic love match with confidence and clarity. Connect and get her free Top Ten Reasons Women are Still Single   at


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