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Jan
31

5 SCARY Moves for Love (Part 3)
Author: Gayla Wick
5 SCARY Moves for Love (Part 3)

From the Desk of Denver Love Coach, Gayla Wick

Having the courage to tell the man who suddenly stopped calling after three months of dating, that his behavior was rude and unacceptable was a new experience for Ann. Before participating in my Group Love Coaching Program she most likely would have spent time ruminating over what she may have done wrong. When a love relationship ends women often think they made a wrong move somewhere. In this case, Debra knew right away it was nothing she did or said – no argument or disagreement had taken place, just an abrupt ending, absent even a break-up phone call or even worse – a text. Good for her and good riddance to a man who was clearly not right for her.

Over the next few months Ann was busy dealing with a new job and other family issues which required her time and energy. The last thing on her mind was dating. After her mother passed away, she planned a trip to Europe with a girlfriend who also wanted recovery time. Ann was excited about this opportunity to visit a country she’d never been to – the origins of her family and somewhere she’d always wanted to visit. But what happened next required yet another big decision.

Just weeks earlier, Ann had updated her profile on an online dating site. In the months prior, she hadn’t answered many emails. When she finally did, there was a message from a very interesting man – someone she would never have previously considered dating. He was five years older and worked in another state. She’d never dated anyone older and she definitely was not interested in dating anyone who lived out of state. Nevertheless, they exchanged emails and slowly got to know each other. Their communication continued via email, text messages, phone conversations and then to video-chats. It soon became clear this long distance relationship had potential.

Just as Ann was about to embark on her two-week European vacation, her budding love interest asked her to come to his hometown for a visit. Although he’d let her know he was interviewing for a job in Colorado, any potential move was months away. He really wanted her to meet his friends and family and to see his lifestyle. She said no. She knew her first priority was to take care of herself. She told him she’d be going on her European trip and they’d talk more about a visit when she returned. This was a scary move for Ann, because she was truly interested in him, but I’m happy to say she followed her instincts this time as a confident woman.

Ann relayed had she not gone through my coaching program she probably would not have had the courage to even consider this relationship. He was nothing like any of the men she’d dated in the past. He was a police officer, lived out of state and was “not tall” as she says. Yet their connection was becoming stronger with every conversation. Ann went to Europe and had a wonderful time learning about her family’s heritage. It felt good to do this, especially since her mother had talked about it and dreamed of going one day herself. When she returned, Ann felt ready to give this new relationship a chance. When the time was right she went to his home state for a visit.

This trip was what they both needed to see this relationship had real potential. He moved to Colorado, but not anywhere near Ann’s location. When he asked her to move in with him, she let him know that wouldn’t be considered unless marriage was on the table. She wasn’t afraid to let him know what she wanted for her life. They are now blissfully in love and living the life they both dreamed about. How fabulous is that?

Super Brave Move Summary:

One: Enrolling in my Love Coaching Program

Two: Bucking family pressure to accept her fate as a single woman.

Three: Telling the man who dumped her that his behavior was unacceptable.

Four: Saying no to a request that might have ended the relationship or in other words standing up for her own desires and needs

Five: More on this next week, but hint: not accepting a non-proposal.

Stay tuned for the conclusion to Ann’s story next week.

 

Gayla Wick, Denver Love Coach and author of The Art of Attracting Authentic Love (A Transformational Four-Step Process) shows women how to go from frustrated and disappointed to attracting an authentic love match with confidence and clarity. Connect with her and get her free Top Ten Reasons Women are Still Single at GaylaWick.com.


 

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